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Writer's pictureAman Deep

A Basic Need



Once there was a boy who was born into a middle-class family. He was very cute. His eyes were like rabbits. People around him call him a chocolate boy. He had a loving mother, a caring father, and a supportive sister. His academic performance was outstanding. The hard work and dedication of a boy towards his studies helped him to crack an entrance exam to get enrolled in a prestigious college. He graduated from college with flying colors. He continued his journey of hard work that paved the way for him to become a gazetted officer. His family was very happy for him. The boy has everything at his disposal. He has a big house, sufficient money to cater to his day-to-day needs, prestige, etc. Suddenly, he started feeling a void within him. He becomes sad and depressed. He has everything yet he is sad. His wise mother instructed him to go to a spiritual master living nearby his home. He followed her advice and went to meet him. He saw that the man is very old. He has a long white beard with alluring eyes. The wise man listened to his problem and smiled at his innocence. He told him that he is lacking spiritual depth within himself. Initially, you are busy fulfilling your desires of the outer world. You don't have the time to look at your inner world. Your inner world as well as your outer world are not nurtured to the fullest. There exists harmony in both worlds. Therefore, you were at ease. Now the demands of the outer world are fulfilled. The inner world is still poor in spirituality. Spirituality means that you haven't yet attained the being. The disparity between the outer and inner world caused restlessness within you. Unless you work on your inner self, you will remain in misery. You have to self-actualize your potential to become silent, peaceful, and blissful. Self-actualization is your basic need. The boy understood the root cause of his suffering. He bowed to the wise man, took his blessings, and return to the home with more wisdom.


The gist of the story is it's not the lack of materialistic things that prevent us from achieving a blissful life. Instead, it's the lack of inner growth that is the root cause of misery. Self-actualization is the basic need of a human being. You might be thinking about ...


What is self-actualization?


Self-actualization is a term popularized by Abraham Maslow. It means a person has to become what he was to become. A man is born with potential. He has the freedom of choice. He becomes what he chooses. He can either actualize his potential or remain wherever he is. Potential doesn't imply outer growth. It is related to inner flowering. Buddha, Krishna, Mahavira, etc. are self-actualized persons. They have attained the highest peak.


The achievements of the outer world like money, power, prestige, etc. give a temporary high for a short period of time. A man is still sad due to his lack of inner growth. The fulfillment of one desire breeds ten more desires. The victories of the outer world can't be substituted for inner flowering. One has to understand the impermanence of things. Unless a man becomes aware of the vicious cycle, he will remain trapped in the web of desires.


“The purpose of life is to know yourself, create yourself, experience yourself as Who You Really Are. There is no other reason to do anything.” Neale Donald Walsch

Usually, an ordinary person is not too tense. He is always grounded. He doesn't have a glimpse of God-like qualities within him. His wings are not yet developed enough to take him to the sky. Artists like musicians, painters, writers, etc. are very tense. They are no longer grounded when they are in act of creating their art. They surrender to the inner source of their power which takes them higher in the sky. They have tasted the nectar of God-like qualities within them. Once the act of creation ends, they are thrown back to the Earth. Now they can't experience divine-like qualities because they have lost contact with their inner wisdom. The split of personalities causes resentment because the gap between the earth(normal human beings) and the sky(People like Buddha) is unbridgeable. The seed of the flower within the artist hasn't fully blossomed yet.


Great poets, great writers, or great men don't mean that they are self-actualized persons. They have grown great in only one dimension of their life. The rest of the dimensions are still undeveloped. They are not total human beings. Buddha, Krishna, Mahavira, etc. are total human beings. They have lived their life in totality. When Buddha attained enlightenment, he went to Kashi to share his insights with them. The king of Kashi came for a visit and was astonished by his aura. He told him that you have nothing other than a begging bowl and still, you look like a king. I have all the materialistic things within my reach and still, I look like a beggar compared to you. "What is the source of your power?", asked the king.


Buddha replied that the power is within you. You have lost contact with your inner being while pursuing materialistic things. Dive deep within yourself and reclaim your power. The sign of a spiritually enlightened person is he carries a flame of light within himself. Wherever he goes, he will ignite the light within others. You start feeling good when you are around them. You will be mesmerized by the bliss emanating from them.


Does the question arise in your mind of how to become a self-actualized person?


A self-actualized person is always centered. He is aware of the center and makes it a permanent abode. Some people think that the center is in their heads, for others it is in their hearts. According to me, a center is an energy that keeps our body alive and connects us with others. It makes us feel that we are not separate entities but a part of one whole. A center is an energy that observes my thoughts as if I am looking at a person from a distance.


Every wheel has a center that keeps it moving. A center can exist without a wheel but a wheel can't exist without a center. Similarly, a soul can exist without a body but a body can't be alive without it. Living in the present moment is the most arduous thing in the universe. A person who is centered is living in the moment. He is aware of all the thoughts that are crossing his mind. He is not in a reactive state. He is looking at the thoughts without any judgment.


Self-actualization is the oxygen for the soul. Brian Johnson

The mood of a person fluctuates with the qualities of the thoughts. The thoughts arise in the mind with respect to a stimulus like external events. A person who is centered moves beyond his thoughts. He is a passive watcher of thoughts. He becomes more than his thoughts. External events have no influence over him. He becomes blissful, peaceful, and silent.


A self-actualized person lives a balanced life. It's easy to live at the extremes. Normally, we can either do too much or do nothing at all. Buddha preached the middle way for his entire life. A balanced person knows the right amount for him. Moderation is the key to a happy life. It can be understood through an example of sleep. Sleeping only for two hours will make a person insane within a few months. Sleeping for twelve hours a day will make a person lazy. Sleep of eight hours a day is an average value for a normal human being. It's not the quantity but the quality that is important. A balanced person stays around the normal value.


In the modern world, majority of the people are struggling with sleep. Even if everything is working fine, still they are not getting quality sleep. Having a good sleep during the night will increase productivity many times the following day. Moon breathing is a technique that will help you to get a night of quality sleep. It consists of breathing through the left nostrils for three to ten minutes before going to sleep.


The main steps of moon breathing are:


  1. Relax and sit comfortably with your back straight. Rest your palm on your left knee.

  2. Close your right nostril with the help of your right thumb and take a deep breath through the left nostril.

  3. Hold your breath and close your left nostril with the help of a right ring finger. Take a small pause. Release the right thumb and exhale gently through the right nostril.

  4. After complete exhalation, again close your right nostril with the right thumb while releasing the right ring finger from the left nostril.

Repeat the above steps for three to ten minutes before going to sleep. It will help you to get a night of quality sleep. Research has shown that inhaling through the left nostril leads to the activation of the parasympathetic nervous system(PNS). It regulates the automatic body functions such as heart rate, metabolism, and body temperature.


The sympathetic nervous system activates the fight and flight mode whereas the parasympathetic system activates the rest and digest mode which keeps you calm and stress-free. When you lie down on a bed after a stressful and tiring day. Left nostril breathing will activate the parasympathetic nervous system that helps you to fall asleep faster and better.


Go toward self-actualization rather than self-image actualization… Search within… for honest self- expression. Bruce Lee

A person who is centered and lives a balanced life will always be at ease. He receives everything with a blissful attitude. He becomes soft, polite, calm, and blissful. His mind has a feminine quality. The masculine and the feminine are the two qualities of the mind. A female can have a masculine mind whereas a male can have a feminine mind. A masculine mind is very dominant, aggressive, and full of anger. A feminine mind is very soft, receptive, caring, patient, and full of love.


Goodhart's law says that when the measure becomes a target then it ceases to be a good measure. Don't force yourself to become soft, polite, and receptive. Feminine qualities are the byproduct of centered and a balanced life. Be more centered and live a balanced life. The divinity will descend over you. You become like a Buddha. You have a potentiality that can be made actual.


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Photo by Mika Matin on Unsplash












2 תגובות


Shubam Salaria
Shubam Salaria
25 בדצמ׳ 2022

Your works shows the profoundness of experience you have & its great !!!

לייק
Aman Bhagnyal
Aman Bhagnyal
25 בדצמ׳ 2022
בתשובה לפוסט של

Thanks a lot Shubam for the encouraging words. It feels good to hear that you have liked my writing.

לייק
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