The quality of our life depends upon the kind of glasses through which we look at the world. Dark glasses create the dark world around us. Conversely, white glasses create the beautiful, serene, and peaceful world around us.
Which kind of glasses are you wearing right now?
Is there any model that helps us to look at the world in a more optimistic way?
To your surprise, the answer is Yes! Before discussing the models, let's understand the meaning of Optimism. According to Morgan Housel, Optimism is a belief that the odds are in your favor and overtime things will balance out to a good outcome even if what happens in between is filled with misery.
Most Respectful Interpretation (MRI) is the best tool available to us to interpret the actions of others in a more positive light. Given any situation, MRI says always interpret it in the most respectful way. You sent birthday wishes to your friend through an email but he hadn't responded. What is your reaction? He doesn't love me. No, Of course not. He loves you.
The most respectful way to interpret this situation is he might be busy. He was so involved in his current project that he forgot to send a reply to you. Analyzing situations using MRI not only makes you a better person but also foster your relationships with others.
Another model you can use in your day to day life is Third Story. A few years back, I thought there are only two sides to the story. One person supports an idea while the other one rejects it. The world is not black or white. Thinking in binary leads us on a wrong path. The best observation is grey thinking. Grey thinking incorporates in it an impartial observer who looks at both pros as well as cons, weigh them accurately to reach the final conclusion.
What do you see in the above image?
If you are like me you see an image of a young beautiful girl. Do you see any other image in it? Look closely, it also contains an image of an angry old lady. Yeah, I know you have spotted both the images. The problem arises when someone sees a beautiful girl in it and not ready to accept that it also contains an image of an angry old lady. You definitely encounter a situation like this in your life. The remedy to this problem is to put yourself inside the shoes of an impartial observer. The crux of this model is to be open-minded. Have a strong opinion over your ideas but hold them loosely. Update them regularly.
In the Computer world, it can be summarized as,
while ( When new information comes)
{
Update your mental Toolbox;
};
I have read a story about a man named Victor. He was reading a book while traveling on a bus. At the next stop, a man stepped inside the bus with his two children. Children started making too much noise. Victor became very upset as it was very difficult for him to concentrate on the book. Victor told the passenger who was sitting next to him, why was this man not shutting up the mouth of his children? Coincidently, the passenger was the distant relative of the children. He told Victor that the man was coming from the funeral of his wife.
Victor was dumbstruck and felt deep empathy for that man and his children. The moral of the story is to always keep an eye on the whole picture.
Another important model is the Fundamental Attribution Error. People do unfair things to us, not because of their intrinsic motivation but because of the external factors that are outside their control is the essence of this model. People are generally good, their intentions are not to make us feel bad. The problem is with our judgments. For example, If someone runs a red light, you often assume that person is inherently reckless but it might be possible that the person is rushing to the hospital for an emergency.
People are generally unconscious of their behavior. They might say something without even considering what impact it has on us. The most arduous thing in this world is to remain aware of ourselves. If someone treats you disrespectfully, forgive them that they are unconscious of it. Try it for a few days, just observe yourself without assigning it any kind of judgment. The flame of consciousness is too bright that it will dispel all the darkness of negativity from your life. It will make you more creative, calm, and serene.
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